Je Souhaite Seulement
by Tiva4evaxxx
Summary: It's Jenny's birthday, and she has a lot to think about. One shot. Happy Birthday Sam! Jibbs. :D


**HAPPY BIRTHDAY SAM!!!!!!!!!!!! This is for Sam, Preppi101, who is amazing, and this is her birthday present! Love you sweetie =DD**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

Je Souhaite Seulement

That morning had been exactly the same as every other normal morning; she'd got up, showered, eaten breakfast and driven to work. Now she was sat here in her office with about a million things to do none of which she felt like doing in the slightest. That was work for you. And if she was honest with herself, she really did miss being a field agent, the excitement the sense of fulfilment... they just didn't come with being Director and being sat in front of a desk most days.

And today she'd done everything the same as usual, tried to kid herself it was just a normal day. Like she did every year, and every year without fail it didn't work. Jenny genuinely hated this day of the year, a lot of people said that, but she really, truly did. And she sure as hell had her reasons. Too many bad memories were dredged up today - memories she'd so often tried her hardest to forget. And the worst, of perhaps the best thing, was that she knew all her efforts could be unravelled, melted away in a heartbeat if she caught a glimpse of that smile. She knew it, he knew it and it made her smile for a second but after that it would make her heart ache for a whole lot longer. And that was then she would remind herself it was for the best, it had been for the best and it still was. The pain wasn't always worth it.

Today was her birthday, and as usual it was a pretty miserable affair. It had been this day, all those years ago, that she had walked out on the only man she had ever truly loved. And that was why she tried so hard to forget, she had been the one who screwed it up, she had been the one who had left him. It made it hurt so much more.

She glanced at the clock on her wall, it was seven o'clock. He'd be arriving about now. It was funny and more than a little strange really, that fate had brought them together again. Ironic, sick and twisted... but strange all the same. That she was director and he was agent. Their roles were reversed this time. Absent minded her hand travelled to the locked drawer on her right, she didn't even have to think about it. She was jolted back to reality really when she felt the familiar worn paper under her delicate hands she looked at the photo and smiled, Paris. Again it was ironic, Paris the city of love. Well its charm had certainly worked on the two of them, undercover ops, dazzling city lights, adrenaline pumping through their bodies, excitement, not to mention the excellent wine. She could still remember it like it had all happened yesterday the picture was so fresh and vivid, alive in her mind. Paris where their love had blossomed. Paris where their love had... no, not died. Never died. She loved that city with all her heart, but she hated it at the same time. She remembered the sweet red roses and the never ending nights, it had been her little piece of heaven. Apparently it only happens once in a life time. She couldn't help but wish, sometimes, that she had fought for it, fought to hold on. To the city, to the man. She wished she had tried, even if it didn't work, even if it was never going to work. Even if it had destroyed her, one little bit at a time. It was better than what she had now, wondering, thinking, dreaming of times long past. Times she would never get back. Times that she clung onto for dear life, because she remembered the feeling of being so alive. It was what falling in love felt like; it was what being loved in return felt like. And she wished every single day she could get it back, because god did she missed it.

Tears shimmered in her eyes, as she recalled that dreadful morning she had left. She had lain in bed the night before, her limbs entangled with his and she watched him fall asleep. She had been unable to slip into that bliss. Looking back she now knew it was the guilt, the guilt of what she was planning as they lay, bodies shining with a thin layer of sweat, and his hand had somehow managed to find hers. She hadn't deserved it. She blinked; a tear fell down and splashed onto the smooth old paper of the photo. She brushed it away angrily, which just caused more to come. Tears blurred her vision but she kept her gaze on the photo. She smiled a little but the moment was bittersweet; it had been a lifetime ago. It really had.

She jumped and turned away quickly as her office door flew open and tried to brush away her tears, "can you please knock next time?" she said angrily not looking round to see who it was.

"Well I'm sorry Jen, I guess I wanted it to be a surprise,"

"Jethro," she said in surprise and turned round, knocking something off her desk in the process. Cursing inwardly, she blushed and looked at him.

He knew, he remembered. She could tell that from just a glance in his direction, she could read him, and not many people could say that about Leroy Jethro Gibbs.

He scrutinised her, "You've been crying." He stated, as though it was pure fact.

"You know why," she shot back.

He glanced down at the photo in her hands, and shifted a little – the only sign he was uncomfortable, he raised his eyebrows at her.

"Happy birthday Jen," he said softly, hurt flashing in his eyes as he set a small, square box down on her desk.

She knew that box. But, surely, it couldn't be... She opened the lid, and fresh tears pricked at her eyes. It was.

"I thought I'd lost it," she whispered, more to herself than him as she fingered the delicate silver chain, her watery eyes met his, pleading for an explanation.

"I kept it," he said softly, "When you left, I found it. And I kept it."

"All this time, you know what that necklace meant to me," she whispered quietly.

"I couldn't," he said, with more emotion than she had ever seen him show, "I just couldn't till now,"

She wrapped the necklace up in the palm of her hand. And it fitted, it fitted so well. That necklace had meant the world to her, and she thought she had lost it, just like she had lost everything else.

She stood up, and walked round to him, not entirely sure what she was doing. She was so close, and she could practically hear her own heart beating. "Thank you," she whispered softly and tears flowed down her cheeks. She pressed a soft kiss to his cheek.

"That wasn't your main present Jen," he said, looking into her eyes.

"No? What is then?" She whispered.

"This," he said, as he crushed her lips to his.

**I hoped you liked it =D Please review, i don't write Jibbs very often. **

**xxxxxxxxxxxxx**


End file.
